Episode 14 (Final) - Masculine vs Feminine Energy - Why Your Life Feels Out of Balance
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[00:00:00] So.
welcome back to another episode of the Starlit Success Podcast. I am your host Jessica Gaines. I have a question for you guys today. What do you think of when you hear someone say the words masculine and feminine energy? I wanna hear what you think of when you hear that,
so I'm gonna. Be honest with you guys. I had this completely wrong and it's kind of embarrassing to admit because now I'm super into self-development and spiritual energy and all that stuff. So I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I was completely off as far as what I thought before I learned about it.
So I'm just curious what comes to mind when you think about it. So as I was like thinking about recording, I'm like, I wanna ask someone who probably has no idea what it means. So what do you do?
You ask a 12-year-old boy. So I asked my 12-year-old son Zanden, [00:01:00] and I'm like, Hey, Zanden when I say masculine energy or feminine energy, what do you think of? So I'm like, okay, feminine energy, what do you think of? And he told me, feminine energy is when you're scared. I was like, Hmm, interesting. So what does masculine energy mean?
He said, masculine energy is when you're scary. And I'm like, huh, okay. I never thought in those terms. He's actually a lot closer to what it is than what I thought. So I always thought masculine energy was associated with men. Like you're masculine, you're like, you're like a dude, you're like a guy. And feminine energy was associated with women, That's why I say it's kind of embarrassing that I had no clue, but I always thought it was like the way that they dress or the way that they carry themselves or their mannerisms or their, their interests, you know? So like, for example, I thought like a [00:02:00] masculine woman was like a tomboy.
Like my best friend, she is like, what I would consider a tomboy. Shout out to my best friend Rachel. Thanks for being a tomboy. I love you. . She doesn't really wear like she does now, but like when we were younger, she didn't really like to wear dresses.
She played sports, she played tennis, she played softball. She could not only play sports, she could talk about sports. Like she's really into all that stuff. She can, she can change a tire.
Embarrassing story, I'll maybe save for another day. It's not really my, my highlight of my life, but she had to change a tire for me when we were living together. And I remember being so amazed, like, oh my God, girl, like you changed a freaking tire. And we were like 21 years old at the time. To me that was super masculine.
. Okay, so that's, that's my interpretation of what like a masculine woman is, which is completely wrong, by the way, but, and we'll get to that in a minute. So, my idea of a feminine man was what we would consider what we used to call a metro.
We'd be like, oh, he's so metro, like a [00:03:00] metrosexual. And my interpretation of that was like someone who is, , this is an ex-boyfriend of mine. He was super metrosexual .
He was constantly in the mirror. It was like, it was such a turnoff. 'cause I'm like, I'm the girl. Why are you in the mirror more than I am? I should be the one looking better than you. Like, you should be worried about how I look anyway. maybe he likes shopping. You know, like, to me those were feminine traits.
The reason I'm embarrassed is because that is not what it is at all. And there was a lot of content out there that talked about this, that talked about feminine energy and masculine energy, I would see the title and I'm like, pass, like not interested because to me it was like, why would anyone care about feminine and masculine energy when it comes to self-development?
To me it had no place, it had no purpose in this world, so I just ignored it
I didn't think I needed to know anything about feminine or masculine energy on my path to pursuing my [00:04:00] purpose or creating my dream life.
And I'm not really sure why I finally ended up watching anything on this or reading anything on this but I'm so glad that I did because I learned a lot the reason I'm recording this episode is because.
I realize now that . Maybe I wasn't alone with this interpretation of what it meant
because one thing that I did learn is when I did start exposing myself to this content around masculine and feminine energy, a lot of the hosts never addressed what I thought it was. I was getting it mixed up. I thought masculine energy was masculinity and feminine energy was femininity.
Those are two different things, but none of the content that I consumed actually addressed that as a mistake. They just talked about what are as though everyone already knew what they were, but I'm like, no, I wanna, I wanna address the fact that there's a difference. So today we're gonna talk about what they actually are.
I've already talked a little [00:05:00] bit about what they're not, but there's also some other things that they're not. So we're gonna talk about what they truly are. And then a key piece is why do we even care? Why should you even care about this? Right? and I'm telling you, you should care.
That's why I'm recording. This is so that you listen to it, and then you understand that it really does make a difference when you understand what these energies are, and then also how you can use them to improve your life. And I'm not just saying like, so go after your dreams or to find your purpose, but these are tools that you can use on a daily basis and the thing that you didn't know.
Is. These are actually one of the secrets to your relationships, to all of your relationships, to your marriage or your romantic relationship, to your relationship with your coworkers, with your boss, with your coach, with your friends. these energies are at the source of every single relationship in your life.
And when you understand what they are and how to use them, I [00:06:00] guarantee your relationships are going to improve.
And I don't care how masculine you think you are, how feminine you think you are. You have some of the other energy in you. Everybody has both.
But the problem is, is that when they're out of balance, that is what causes the issues. That is when you start to feel frustrated, you start to feel disconnected, you start to feel unfulfilled. You start to feel stressed
when these energies are out of balance, then a lot of the times you feel out of balance. there's a way to manage them with your relationships, but there's a way to manage it within yourself, with the relationship that you have with yourself.
So the goal here today is I wanna help you understand how to balance these energies within yourself and recognize maybe where you're out of balance and how to integrate the two so that you can start to feel more powerful and not only powerful, but peaceful as well.
Okay, so we've covered that masculine energy is not masculinity and femin [00:07:00] energy is not femininity. masculinity and femininity is like this socially constructed set of traits. So we tend to think that masculinity.
Like, you watch or you play sports or you know about sports maybe you're like really into cars. Like my boys, they love cars, they love talking about engines and models that's an SRT and that's a X 400.
I'm totally, I'm making this up by the way. I have no idea what I'm talking about. Maybe you're really good with your hands. You know how to fix things.
I live in Wisconsin, so there is a lot of hunters, a lot of fishermen. if I were to make a list of all the people that were really into cars and really into sports and really into DIY stuff, the majority of them are gonna be men. So that is my misinterpretation of what that meant because I know like my nieces hunt,
my sister-in-law and my best friend are amazing at. Fixing stuff like they can figure anything out. But that's not what masculine energy is. Another misconception about masculine energy is that you have to suppress your [00:08:00] emotions.
That you have to be strong. You know the term that we use is man up. we're literally associating that with a man. We think that to be strong or to suppress emotions that that's associated with being a man. These are all more like the toxic masculine energy
that
isn't exactly what masculine energy is. so I'm just gonna go through all of the things that are not what it is first, and then we'll get into what it actually is.
Another one that actually has the whole man thing in the title is having. Power or having like control over others being in charge, having some sense of like authority, but not necessarily in a good way, You might hear the term like, you're the man, like you showed them, or you run this.
It doesn't necessarily mean that it's healthy, but you have power and control.
This is a common one, measuring worth through success. You are attaching your self-worth through being successful at something else. And a really, really, really common one, and something that I witness on a regular [00:09:00] basis is sports. I dealt with this with my oldest son.
he really struggled with this when he got injured. and I'm sure it goes from other age groups, but from what I'm living, my experiences is like these teenage boys, they are measuring their self worth through their success in sports. playtime, stats, approval from the coach, all of these things, they think that.
That is what determines their success
and I think a big part of why teenage boys feel like that is because that's just something that has been ingrained in them since they were young. You see the Michael Jordans and the Kobe Bryant since like those are their idols. And then especially if they have a dad that's super competitive or that was really into sports.
you hear these dads on the sidelines that are like insane. I'm not gonna lie, like my husband yells a lot, but my husband will yell in a sense of like he's passionate about the game. These dads I hear are like. Doing get there. You need be [00:10:00] over there. Like they're yelling. Not only are they yelling at their own child in that way, they're yelling at other people's kids
Like they're living their. Sports dreams or basketball dreams through their kid. And it's, it's kind of sad 'cause it's like these kids are, are amazing kids and you hear the dad like, I'm scared of the dad.
If I had a bad game and that was my dad, I would not wanna get back in the car and hear that all the way home. So they feel like the only way they're gonna get some sense of approval or feel accomplished is if they perform. Nothing else matters other than how they perform in the court and what the results of that game look like.
In addition to that, or kind of associated with that is like hustle. You need to hustle, you need to work harder, right? It's always about do more, work harder, be stronger. that is like this toxic masculine energy.
Or that asking for help is weak. So not only is showing your feelings weak, but if you ask for help, that's weak too. how many times have you seen like the dad who's lost on a trip and you maybe [00:11:00] it's like a movie or a cartoon or something. I know my dad may have been guilty of this in the past because when I grew up, we didn't have GPS.
I'm dating myself, but it's the truth. So we had maps, like if we were going camping or we were going on a road trip, like we literally had a paper map. And if we were lost, I swear, like my dad did not want to admit that we were lost. And how many other dads out there would feel the same way. They don't wanna ask for help.
They don't wanna admit that they might have been wrong, that they don't actually know where they're going. Or maybe, they don't hire someone to fix something in their house. They do it themselves because they don't wanna admit that they need help with something.
They'll just figure it out. That's like more of a masculine trait. in, our culture. Doesn't necessarily mean that's what masculine energy means, but . That tends to be something a man would do over a woman. Right? Women will be like, I don't know. I need help. Help me out. , And I'm not saying that these are the only things that we tend to.
Have a misconception about as far as masculine energy, this is just the things that I came up with. So here's a list for feminine. [00:12:00] So to be feminine, we tend to think that when you're feminine, you wear makeup, you wear dresses, maybe you do your hair, or you're into the arts, you're into dance.
That's all very feminine in our culture. and this is kind of funny ' cause when I asked my son what feminine energy was and he said, you're scared, right? And I'm like, that actually isn't too far off. it was. Better than what I thought. So it was more aligned with what our culture thinks.
But yeah, our culture thinks that being feminine is to be weak or that you're soft. it might mean that you let other people tell you what to do, or maybe you play a victim a little bit more. kind of like damsel in distress. Think about how many freaking princesses had to be rescued or saved by a prince, right?
who was it? It was Rapunzel. Pretty sure she was saved by a prince Cinderella. The prince had to match the shoe, And then was it sleeping? [00:13:00] Beauty? She had to be kissed by a prince, So many princesses had to be saved. They had to be rescued because they're like, oh, I'm just so feminine.
I need some masculine energy here to save me.
Even though that's not true, that's what we were, I mean, we were raised on Disney movies, and that's one of the things that we always saw that a woman needed to be saved by a man. So that means like the woman is weaker, And the man is stronger and the man is there to save the day. Another feminine trait is people pleasing.
Thinking that we need someone else's permission, someone else's approval, someone else's validation.
We need someone else to say it's okay. And I mean, this dates back. Before women had voting rights, before women really worked outside of the home. I mean, this, again, this is all based off of our culture. . Another one is thinking, being assertive.
Or having a mind of your own is not ladylike or like dumbing down your own skills or your own intelligence to avoid [00:14:00] appearing intimidating. Maybe you're staying quiet to avoid some kind of confrontation or just to be nice.
This is something that I've dealt with for most of my life because I feel like I. I really started to find my voice in my teenage years and I guess maybe just teenagers are teenagers and they're obnoxious and loud and have opinions, but still to this day I feel like I am just one to, I'm gonna, I'm gonna speak up.
I'm not gonna just be quiet just because I'm a woman. And that's what others might expect of me. I'm pretty sure. I have mortified my dad on more than one occasion in being this way because, you know, I love my dad.
There have been a couple times, and, and one time in particular, I was over at their house and they had a friend over and this friend had been in my life for my whole life. And I think, I wanna say I was probably like early twenties at this point.
So I wasn't even a teenager. I was early twenties. Like I was a mature adult [00:15:00] and I know that he stole something out of my parents' room and my parents were looking for it. And it was in there 'cause I was in there. We were, we were getting in and out of the hot tub that night. So I was in my parents' room changing and , when I changed, it was in there.
I left the room and I saw this friend go in their room after me. And then after he was in there, my mom or my dad went in there. And that thing was gone. So then they, they start looking at it. Did anyone see this? Did anyone know where it was? Looking for it. Looking for it. And I'm like, it was in there when I was in there.
Like, what? It's not there now. it, it was in there before I was in there, but it wasn't in there after he was in there. So I'm like, he stole it. My parents didn't know this at the time. I knew it. So I call him out and I'm like uh, you took it like I know you took it. I don't even have to ask anyone.
I know for a fact you took it because it was in there when I left. You were the only person that went in after me. And the person that came in after that was my mom, and now it's gone. this guy sat there [00:16:00] and denied it and denied it. And this guy didn't always have the best reputation.
And I sat there and I got into a whole heated argument with him so like I'm saying, so thinking, being assertive is not ladylike, right? Staying quiet to avoid confrontation.
I'm not doing any of those things. No, you're wrong. I know you're wrong. And I'm gonna say something about it. Well, that leads into a whole thing. He calls me, a racially derogatory term because my husband is black, but that right there now we're name calling.
I know in that moment that my parents could never be friends with him again.
I think my dad was upset because he felt that I was a part of, and this is totally my perspective, but in that moment I think he thought like, man, if she wouldn't have done that, then I wouldn't have just lost my friend. Right? But it's not, it wasn't about that.
If your friend's sitting here stealing from you and lying to you, that's not really your friend. . He [00:17:00] realized that after time. But at the moment, I think I mortified him because he is like, oh my God, would you just shut your mouth? Like, why are you making this big scene? And in my mind, I'm like, I'm protecting you guys.
You guys are my family. I'm not gonna let this creep come in here and steal and lie to you, to your face when I know it. So I know that was off on a tangent a little bit, but I will never just be quiet just to avoid confrontation. Not gonna happen. That's not who I am. But I don't think he was mad at me. I just think it was because I was more in my masculine energy, and I don't think that he was comfortable with that
so it wasn't like I was just being sassy, I was being protective. It came from a good place and I will always protect my family by any means.
So that's the list of what masculine energy and feminine energy is not. it's just what we've been conditioned to believe through our society, through culture, through, like I said, movies. that's just what we believe to be [00:18:00] true. But masculine and feminine energy, it's the source of energy. It's not specifically tied to a gender. Because everybody has both energies.
what true masculine energy is, is it's having a clear vision, It's being focused, it's being a leader, setting goals, making decisions, taking action.
Acting as a guide, not controlling or dominant, like the toxic masculine energy not being the man. It's leading by example.
It's using reason and logic to find practical solutions to problems.
Real masculine energy is creating a sense of structure, a sense of order, or like organization, discipline. Maybe it's helping with time management.
Creates a sense of safety, of stability.
What happens when we don't have structure, when we don't have some kind of order. It's chaos. If we [00:19:00] don't have some kind of boundaries to live within, then we don't have any set expectations. this is a cute story I have to share. So my 12-year-old son when he was younger, well he still has his friend, so we've got this neighborhood friend, he's been friends with him ever since we first moved in.
So when my son was like six years old, and this boy sweet boy, they're still friends to this day, but not as close as they were when they were younger and he was over here a lot. You know, they were always hanging out. And this boy has a different type of family dynamic. so he lives with his dad and his grandma and his brother. So it's just a little bit different. he would come over here a lot for dinner, not like he was just coming over here for dinner, but he was like, already over here and I'd be cooking dinner and I'd be like, Hey, do you want, you want dinner?
And he'd be like, yeah. So I remember running into his grandma one day on a walk and she's like, yeah. So and so said that he likes coming to your house because you guys have organized meals. Like [00:20:00] that is the cutest little term I've ever heard an organized meal. To me that was just, that's just what we do.
We just, we cook dinner and we sit down and we eat. To him, that was something new to him. He never really had organized meals because the family dynamic was a little bit different. And we know, I don't know. I'm not, I'm not out here trying to like shit on dads or anything 'cause dads are awesome.
I love my husband. I know there's a lot of great dads out here, but. If you're a dad, please don't take any offense to this this is gonna sound terrible, but dads don't always think about feeding their kids. Number one, like I'm gonna tell you, I've been on a lot of my girls trips or like, out and about all day, and I come home and it's like eight o'clock at night, and I'm like, did you feed the kids?
And it's like, oh well, I asked if they were hungry, and then I asked the kids, I'm like, did you eat? No, I'm, I'm hungry. Could you make me something? I'm like, dude, I've been gone all day. And you didn't feed the kids. Like, I don't know. It's just like, not something in a man's brain to like organize a meal, I guess.
Anyway, off on a tangent here, but [00:21:00] basically the little boy felt. A little bit more safe when there were some organized meals. Okay, so structure prevents chaos. You feel better? Okay, masculine energy, it is assertive, it's confident, it's having courage, it's taking charge.
It's speaking up. Speak up. You got something on your mind. Speak up. Right? You don't have to be a, a jerk about it, but you can tactfully say whatever it is that you're thinking , especially if it's to address a problem and come up with a solution.
If you see something shady, stand up for what's right. Protect your people, protect your family. Protect your friends. You don't have to just sit there and let shit get outta hand when there's something that you can do about it.
And going through this list, I'm like, you guys, I have a lot of masculine energy, man. I'm like all of these things, but I'm also like super feminine. All right, what is real feminine energy? True Feminine energy is being [00:22:00] intuitive.
So you, listen to and you trust your inner guidance. you follow your gut, right? You're not always in your head.
And that's what you use to navigate the world. Knowing your worth, you know? Attracting opportunities, attracting positive energy and not always chasing, not always having to go after things and having high standards, Not settling.
Feminine energy is also associated with emotional intelligence, having the ability to express and understand your emotions and see them as a source of power,
you can use your emotions To help others,
Having compassion and empathy for others. And again, this is feminine energy, not femininity. Men can have all of these feminine energies as well. My husband has quite a few of these, which is probably why we work so well.
Nurturing is associated with feminine energy. nurturing [00:23:00] ideas, helping others, helping things grow. So maybe it's not necessarily nurturing, a person, although it could be maybe you nurture ideas, maybe you nurture other people's creativity.
You're there to help others or other things. Being open and vulnerable and authentic. being real at the end of the day, just being who the hell you are, which when you are who you are, that fosters that like genuine connection with other people. you know, when you first meet someone, like if they're being real or not
and when you know someone is being real, and when you're real with yourself, then it's a lot easier to build trust with someone because you're being who you are. They're being who they are. There's nothing shady going on. When you have nothing to hide, it's a lot easier for someone to trust you and for you to trust yourself. creativity, feminine energy is all of the creativeness, all of those juices, right?
Your ability to give life to new [00:24:00] ideas. Maybe you're fostering some kind of change it's a way to express yourself.
I feel like creativity is always associated with the arts. Like you have to be some kind of artist to be creative. Like you have to make music or you have to be a painter
creativity is doing something original. Being original.
So like having a new idea about something and implementing it, or maybe you're like an inventor, like you're not necessarily like an artist, but you created this new thing or a new way of going about something. Hold on. I wanna look at what creativity means.
Creativity is the use of the imagination or original ideas, especially in the production of an artistic work. See, I knew they were gonna throw something in there with artists, but
it doesn't necessarily have to have anything to do with being artistic, right? If you have an original idea and you're using your imagination, you are being creative, and that is your feminine energy, okay? Flow and [00:25:00] receptivity. So just being in the moment, being flexible
being willing to receive without resistance. That's the key part. , And then also without controlling how they come in. Being magnetic, right? So if you want something and you set this intention out there, sometimes you can't always decide on the how.
Sometimes you just have to just be open and let things fall where they may, and that is being in your feminine. Everyone has both of these energies regardless of their gender. It's really the yin and the yang. So the yin is feminine, yang is masculine.
These are opposite forces that are interconnected. And not only do each of them contain a piece of the other within themselves, but they depend on each other. And they also bring out the best of the other.
So like myself, like many women, I know we can have masculine energies. Where [00:26:00] we are action oriented, we are assertive, we are confident,
we use logic and we're a leader. But then you can also have men who have feminine. So maybe they're very intuitive, maybe they're very creative or maybe they're vulnerable. Maybe it's a lot easier for this man or these men to allow things in and not control things.
But ultimately, everybody has both. Whether they're a man, a woman, , even if you're gender neutral, you're gonna still have feminine and masculine energies. Because it has nothing to do with the gender. It's like I said, it's the source of the energy that we're talking about.
And it's funny 'cause I feel like that's why most couples are always opposites. 'cause if you think about it, like, me and my husband, we're complete opposites we balance each other's energies.
So the goal is to balance these two energies and then integrate them to enhance the other one. The problem is that. When you think you have to be one or the other, or you think someone else has to be [00:27:00] one or the other, no one can just be all masculine or all feminine.
Maybe they have more of one than the other, but they're not gonna be all masculine or all feminine. You're gonna run into trouble if you think that you need to restrict yourself to one role or if you think someone else has to be restricted to one role.
You might end up suppressing certain parts of your personality that is natural to you because that's what you think is expected. So maybe you are a man who is very emotional. You might think that you have to suppress them because that's what everyone else expects, but then you're betraying yourself. And when you betray yourself, that's gonna create internal conflict.
Or maybe you're a woman and you have a super clear vision and you're super focused, and you wanna take the lead on this, you wanna take action on this, but you're maybe afraid of how it'll look. So you just kind of dim your light a little bit because you wanna just do whatever is expected. You're gonna create this turmoil within yourself because how [00:28:00] can you truly be happy if you're not being yourself , you're gonna hide who you are deep down, and by doing that, you're gonna block opportunities that are meant for you.
And when they're out of balance? So if you have too much masculine energy, you might feel stress or anxiety. Because you're like in this constant doing mode with no time to just receive or allow
Too much of either energy is gonna create some kind of conflict. Think about two people. I can think about two people right now who are always trying to take control.
They wanna take the lead, they wanna take the action. maybe this is in your workplace, it could be in your relationship, it could be on, a sports team. But if you've got two people who have all this masculine energy, what do you think is gonna happen?
they're probably gonna bump heads Or think of the other, side of the coin, to people who are too much in their feminine energy where they aren't taking [00:29:00] action and they're both in this receiving mode, but they never make a decision.
Nothing's gonna get done. If you have two people who are just constantly like in receiving and in allowing, then nothing is going to actually happen. So you have to have some balance of both.
So think of your inner world or these inner energies like a garden. I like to use gardens as a metaphor because I just feel like nature is just the true way of being in life or in this world. So when we think of a garden, you have to have a gardener. So the masculine energy is the gardener. And what does the gardener have to do?
They have to have a vision, a clear direction. So they have to know that they want to actually plant a garden. They have to take action. So they're buying the seeds. They have to prep the soil for planting. They have to protect the space.
But in order to have a healthy garden.
The feminine energy has to just have patience.
Let that feminine energy step in and just trust that nature will do its thing. It's not gonna just [00:30:00] sprout overnight. You have to allow the rain to come to water and nourish the soil.
You just have to allow things to happen in their own time, whenever that is. Now, if you were to only have masculine energy. When planting a garden or taking care of a garden, you're going to overplan, you're going to over water. You're going to try to like force the flowers to bloom, right?
But if you only have feminine energy, you might just sit there and like dream of the garden and you just. Try to just allow it in and you're just like having these, intuitions and these feelings about what you would want to plant, but you don't ever take any action to do anything about it.
True growth happens when both energies work together. So you're gonna plant with intention but then you're gonna allow nature to do the rest. I think about my husband and I, we both have a really good balance of masculine and feminine energies.
And I think about our time working together or when we work together. if he didn't have that feminine [00:31:00] energy of being creative and creating music, and of allowing and receiving, so receiving my help and allowing me to help him. if I didn't have the masculine energy of having a vision to help him or taking action and doing all of the things that I did to research and join groups and sign him up for things and get him connected with artists.
We would have never made any progress on his music
but that's why we work together because we had the perfect balance of feminine and masculine energy To achieve a goal, you need a good balance of them both. So when you have too much masculine energy, you might try to dominate a decision. You might try to control an outcome instead of actually allowing other people to help or allowing other people to contribute.
Maybe you burn yourself out because you're in constant hustle mode without taking the time to rest or without listening to your intuition, or without just letting things flow to you.
But if you're too [00:32:00] much in your feminine, you might have a dream, but you just think it's just gonna fall on your lap. You just think that it's just gonna happen and you don't have to take any action to get there
You have to have a vision. You have to take action, but you also have to allow your intuition to guide you, and you have to be willing to allow and trust the universe to help you on this path.
When you understand how to balance these energies, you're gonna allow them to work together and it's gonna be in harmony.
So I want you to think of the masculine energy and the feminine energy as partners. They're not competitors,
so each of them. Essential. So the masculine provides the structure, the direction, the discipline, the protection, the feminine energy offers, the, the creativity, the intuition, the flow, the nurturing energy. So you're gonna be able to make confident decisions, take action, but also trust your intuition. Allow room for that guidance, and then move in the right direction to whatever feels aligned for you
[00:33:00] you are gonna be productive without burning yourself out,
And your relationships are gonna be stronger because you're bringing the best out of each other, right? You're not competing. Or you're not just both sitting back, not taking action, not actually doing anything. about a problem.
So what do I do? How do I balance these energies? you can't do anything until you're aware of where you're out of balance. So the first thing I want you to do is ask yourself, am I doing too much? I love this phrase, 'cause my husband says it to me all the time, like, you're doing too much. He's always telling me I'm doing too much.
He's just like, sit down. Would you just sit down somewhere? Because I'm like constantly in go mode. I always feel like I need to be doing something right. that is something that I've learned about myself. If he sees that I'm just like constantly going out and ever sit down, maybe I need to sit down.
Maybe I just need to rest sometimes, you know, and not feel guilty about it.
So it's, it's usually wherever you feel some kind of resistance, that's where the balance is needed.
Is it in your relationship with [00:34:00] your spouse or your partner or with your kids? Is it at work? Maybe it's with a coworker or with a boss or a teammate or a coach. notice is there some kind of tension here? Are we both delivering too much of the same energy?
Is there something. About their energy that I can kind of counteract with the other, or counterbalance with the other. So if they're the ones always trying to control, I'm not saying that you just let them, but how can you kind of use whatever it is they're doing and recognize where you can balance it with some kind of feminine energy.
I am really good at adapting to other people's energies. So if I notice that someone is more in their masculine, I can naturally adapt and get more in my feminine. Or if I notice that someone's more in their feminine, I can naturally adapt and, and turn on more of my masculine. But I've noticed within myself, I tend to run more in like a masculine mode.
Over the last few years, I've really turned up my feminine energy as far as like being intuitive and allowing and receiving and [00:35:00] trusting. But some feminine energy practices you can start to incorporate
a big one that I've talked about is starting to meditate. It's just starting to get connected, starting to get in that receiving mode. That's what meditation's all about. It's getting in that receiving mode. Start some creative hobbies. Um, where can you let your creativity shine?
If you don't have any kind of creative outlets, what is something that you could maybe start.
just start jotting down some ideas and then rest. If you're someone like me who's like constantly thinking that you always have to be doing something, like you're always having to take some kind of action or be productive.
Allow some space to just rest and to just be still and to just allow and let things just happen the way they're supposed to. And if you're more in your feminine, try to practice some more masculine activities. So maybe if you're always in that creative mode, maybe try some goal setting. Try some action planning.
Take some initiative, set some boundaries, and, and create some structure for [00:36:00] yourself. Every dream, no matter what it is that you have needs both. You're always going to need some sense of inspiration and intuition and guidance and execution. integrate them daily.
if it's something that you're having to take action on, or, you know, set a direction or set a goal, ask yourself like, how can I make this a little bit more fun or easier? How can I make it easier? And honestly, sometimes maybe it's rest, maybe it's just doing nothing. Maybe it's just like letting the universe send you whatever creative downloads you're supposed to get, and.
If you need to integrate something more masculine, ask yourself, what is one thing I can do today? one action item that I can do that will move me closer to my goal or move me closer to my dream life. Okay, so it's what I got for you today, DM me. Comment, let me know what your thoughts were. Did you think masculine and feminine energy was what I thought it was?
Am I the only one? Am I the only one that had it all the way wrong, thinking that it was [00:37:00] masculinity and femininity? I wanna know that I'm not the only one. Help me out here. So I'd love to hear what you took away from this episode.
Tag me, DM me. Leave a comment. I'd love to hear from you. Until then, I will see you on the next episode.
