EP40 Nobody Can Do It Like YOU - The Gift You've Been Underestimating
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[00:00:00] You're like the stars in outer space. Something about you radiates. And it feels so nice, and it feels so nice, yeah
What if you had an amazing gift or, like, some really unique talent, But you never even knew that you had it
What if it's something that has just always come so natural to you that you never even really noticed that it was a gift or a talent?
It could be as simple as just the way you keep your house organized or maybe you're just someone that's never afraid to speak your mind
It's probably something that you don't think is that unique or that special because it's always been something that you've always done. It's always just been easy for you. It's never been something that you've ever had to put a lot of effort into or ever learn how to do
But what if one of those things is one of the reasons that you were put here to share with everyone else?
On the other hand, let's say that you do know that you're really good at something or that you do have some really special talent
But maybe you don't think that you [00:01:00] could ever really do anything with it
Maybe you're like, "Yeah, I'm pretty good at it. I'm probably better than most, but there's a lot of other people that are way better than me, or there's a lot of other people out here that are already doing it at a higher level."
But this is the part I think a lot of us miss, and that is, what if they can't do it like you?
What if the thing that makes you so unique isn't even necessarily what you do, but how you do it?
Hi, I'm Jessica, and you are listening to the Starlit Success podcast
I genuinely believe that every single one of us has something unique to contribute to the world. And not only do we have something unique, but we are meant to share that with others
And I think one of the easiest ways to see this kind of in real life is to just look at the people around us
Think about all the friends that you've had in your life. You know, all of my friends are so different, and oftentimes the friends that we have are our friends [00:02:00] because they kind of serve different purposes in our life
Maybe you have that one friend that you know you can turn to when you're going through something difficult or that you can have those really deep conversations with.
And then you have another friend who you can call on just to be silly with, just to be a goofball, just to kind of let loose and enjoy yourself
Maybe you have another friend who's like really spontaneous and adventurous, and you know that you can call them at any moment and they'll be down for whatever it is, whether it's going on a hike or going on a trip
and then maybe you have one friend that is all of those things
I have a pretty big group of friends, and I honestly cannot say that any one of them is exactly like another
They're all really unique in their own way. Yes, they might be similar to another friend, but there's something specific about them that the other one doesn't have
I can think of two friends specifically that both of them are super goofy, super funny. I honestly think that each one of them could be a comedian if they really wanted [00:03:00] to. But one of them is, like, really good at crafting. and making really thoughtful gifts.
And then the other one is like an amazing cook. Her dishes look like they're straight out of the Food Network
It's like, yeah, they're similar. They're both goofy. They're both kind of out there. They both can talk to anyone, but there's other parts of them that are very different
And it makes me wonder like how my friends or family would describe me. And you can ask yourself the same thing, like how would your friends or family describe you?
Like what is something that you're known for, that everybody knows that you like or that you do?
I think about my nephew who's 13. This kid is so smart when it comes to any kind of sports facts. Like, he rattles off the names of all kinds of different players. Like, he knows all their player stats
He follows all the trades, all their injuries.
He's even on the fantasy football team this year, I think because he has demonstrated his pure knowledge of the game, and he can [00:04:00] hang with the big dogs
I think about my sister-in-law. Like, if I were to have a question about how to do something around the house, like how to do like a DIY project or something, she's the first person I would call. She's someone who's fixed her dryer, she's put in floors, she's redid her cabinets
She's fixed her lawnmower. I actually always joke that she's the man of the house and not my brother.
Like what do people come to you for? what is something that maybe someone was having a hard time with or they needed some direction on, they needed some advice on where they would think of you to call?
Maybe you're a really good cook. Maybe , they've never made a turkey before, and you're the first person they call because they need help. They have no idea what to do. Or maybe you're just someone who's really good at planning. Maybe they recognize how organized you are and how you think of all the small things, and they're just not good at that.
Or maybe you're just a really good listener. Maybe you're someone who makes other people [00:05:00] feel heard and feel safe and feel comfortable,
And maybe they call you because they just needed to feel better about a situation
And these are just a few examples of things that we probably already know about ourselves, we probably already know that we're kinda good at or that we're interested in
But think about all the things that we haven't even tried yet
Because sometimes your gifts aren't necessarily things that you've always been good at
I'm certainly not the same person I was five years ago because I feel like my values have changed and a lot of my interests have changed
You can get into new things and you can learn new skills, and you can discover abilities that you never even knew that you had
I have learned so much in the last five years and discovered so many interesting things that I had never been exposed to previously or had never been on my radar
obviously some of the things I've learned have been so interesting that I just feel so compelled to share it with everyone, which is obviously why I'm here
But you could even discover something like completely off the wall that no one else is doing, no one else has even thought of
But it could be something that you [00:06:00] absolutely love doing. I freaking saw this lady on the news the other day. She was riding a unicycle while throwing, like, China plates on her head, and I think she even had them on her feet, like she was balancing them on her feet. And I instantly thought, like, how did you even discover that you were good at that or that you like doing it?
But then I was like, "You know what? She looks really familiar," and I remember that she did the halftime show at one of the Bucs games that I went to years ago. And I'm like, "She is literally making a name for herself, and probably making a living off of this rare freaking talent that she has."
But it reminded me, like, you don't even know what you're necessarily good at until you try But either way, whether it's something that you already know that you're really good at, you already know that you're unique and talented at, or whether it's something that it's brand new to you and you just tried it and you realize that you love it there is something special about you
and you have something unique to contribute
Think about it. How are you already using it? ? How are [00:07:00] you already sharing whatever your gifts are with the people around you?
But now let's talk to the person who already knows that you're really good at something
But maybe you talk yourself out of pursuing it further because you think that maybe other people are better than you or there's too many people already doing it
I believe that you can have a talent or a skill that is similar to someone else, but I feel like it's still gonna be unique in your own way
I think that's something that a lot of us underestimate about ourselves, including myself
Like I know there's other podcasters doing this. I know there's other online coaches talking about a lot of the same things, but I am the only Jessica that can talk about my own perspective
The first thing I thought about here was restaurants, and more specifically, chicken fast food restaurants, probably because my family eats at them all the time
So we've got KFC, Popeyes, Chick-fil-A, Raising Cane's, Dave's Hot Chicken
Wingstop, and probably others that I'm not even thinking of [00:08:00] right now
They're all successful. They're all in the same industry
but they all have like their own thing that makes each one of those restaurants special and unique
So Raising Cane's is like strictly chicken fingers, and they have like really good sauce. I'm a huge fan of their sauce and their buttered toast is really good.
Then you have Popeyes, who is, like, the Louisiana style. they got their red beans and rice. Really good. I also love Popeyes Then you got Dave's Hot Chicken, which is more like the spicy Nashville style
And then you got KFC who's got the fried chicken, special recipe, bucket style meals, and then you got Chick-fil-A who I'm not a huge fan of Chick-fil-A personally, please don't fight me, my kids are, and I honestly don't know what makes them so special. I know their customer service is really good.
They do have really good lemonade, I will say that
But that's my point. Like, they don't all have to be the same
and we don't all have to like the same one You can have different versions of something that people already love.
And I feel like the same goes for us because it's not necessarily what somebody does, but sometimes it's just about [00:09:00] who they are and how they do it
so I learned about a principle called the law of dharma, which is actually one of the seven spiritual laws of success
And the idea is that every single one of us has a unique purpose in life
We each have a unique talent and a unique way of expressing it
and when we use those gifts to serve others, that is how we fulfill our purpose
so the example I like to give here is think about comedians
a lot of them are talented, a lot of them are really funny, but a lot of them have completely different humor. They have different styles, they have different stories and specifically, very different deliveries
I feel like a lot of them have like their own shtick. You know, you got some comedians that talk a lot about politics, some make jokes on religion, you've got some that talk a lot about like parenting and family life
But again, they're all different
And just because someone is like a successful comedian and they are really funny to a lot of people doesn't necessarily mean that I like I can't tell you how many Netflix comedy specials that I've turned on and have gotten maybe a few minutes [00:10:00] in or maybe even 10 minutes in, and then I just completely abandon them because I never got into it. I never felt like they were speaking to me
But then there are others, like Sebastian Maniscalco, where I have tears streaming down my face and my stomach hurts and my cheeks hurt from laughing so freaking hard.
If you don't know who Sebastian Maniscalco is, I'm putting you on right now. Find him on YouTube or Netflix. Again, this might not speak to you. He might not be funny to you. But to me, like, the stuff that he talks about and just his mannerisms and his body language and how he carries himself is, is hilarious
It's really at the end of the day, it's just, it's who I connected with, and the same goes for you
So the comedians have a unique talent, they have a unique expression, and they are serving others. They are sharing those gifts with others to bring them joy, to bring them happiness
So I feel like they are all living out their dharma. But I also feel that this doesn't just [00:11:00] apply to, like, people in the entertainment industry. I feel like it can affect whose advice that we're willing to listen to
I was watching a Mel Robbins video podcast the other day, and she was interviewing Benny Blanco, who is, like, a top-rated music producer in the music industry. I guess he's got, like, 29 number one hits
And the topic was all about, like, doubting yourself and failure. And a lot of the topics that they touched on in the episode were all self-development topics that are talked about pretty often in the self-development world
But Eddie was actually in bed with me watching it, and this isn't something that he would normally watch, but I think when he realized who it was, the fact that it was a music producer, it seemed like he was paying more attention than he normally would. he said he looked familiar. He didn't even really know his name, but later on he discovered that he was actually already following him on Instagram
but I thought it was interesting that he was actually paying attention because I, I honestly feel like if it was Mel Robbins interviewing some, Stanford professor [00:12:00] on, you know, the statistics of people doubting themselves and how to overcome failure and setbacks, I don't know that he really would have tuned in like he did when he knew it was a music producer.
Like, I, I felt like it was someone that he could see himself in and that he could relate to, and he was just, more willing to listen to him versus someone else. So you could literally have two people saying the exact same thing, but I really believe that one person you just connect with more, and that's the person that you're gonna take advice from
You know, when you have a similar background, you have a similar interest, you have a similar lifestyle
I think it piques your interest when you see someone that kinda reminds you of yourself you feel a little bit more seen
And this is another part I think a lot of us really miss You can be the reason that someone is interested in what you have to say simply because of who you are
So all I'm trying to say is that every one of us is super unique and has something [00:13:00] to contribute to the world
Could be something that's always come naturally to you and you've never really thought twice about it
Maybe it's something you discovered later in life, or maybe it's something that you've never even discovered yet
And just because other people are already doing it does not mean that you shouldn't
' , nobody has your exact personality. your exact experience, your exact perspective, the way you see it. or the way you explain something, or the way you create something. your spin on it,
Only you have that
And keep in mind, like not everyone is going to connect with you, and that's totally okay. In fact, that's good. Not everybody likes the same chicken restaurants, and they're all doing just fine
I don't like every single comedian. I don't like every single singer. I don't like every single actor. You probably don't either. It's not realistic to think that everyone's gonna like you or that everybody's gonna connect with you
You don't have to be for everyone, and matter of fact, I don't think that you should . because honestly I feel like if you're for everyone, then honestly you're for no one
so if you're sitting there thinking like, "Okay, cool, but I have no idea what my [00:14:00] thing is. I don't even know where I would start. I don't even know what I'm good at."
Just start paying attention to yourself a little bit more
Ask your friends and family, like what do they think makes you, you?
, What would they say that you're really good at? You might be surprised what they say
Write down the things that you love doing
Things that come easy to you Or things that you're just curious about
also don't be afraid to experiment and try new things
You might be surprised at discovering something that you're really good at
And I say this in a lot of my episodes, but just spend some time with yourself. .
just trying to connect with yourself on more of a deeper level, and quiet your mind. because your mind is always just filled with thoughts. It's always going, going all the time. And I just think that creates so much interference, and when you can calm that down and get quiet, you start to tune in You're, like, opening that receiver You kind of just let things come to you
And if you do already know what your thing is, but maybe you've been, like, second-guessing trying it or pursuing it
Because other people are already doing it
I hope [00:15:00] this helps you look at it a little bit different
Think about how you could use what you already know or what you already love
or what you're already good at to help someone else
It doesn't have to turn into a business.
It doesn't have to be some huge life-changing thing
Sometimes sharing your gifts is just as simple as being yourself and letting other people benefit from it
you never know who might need what you have, or who might need to hear it from you
I hope this was helpful. I hope you are seeing your unique talents and your unique gifts in a different way. Just start paying attention to yourself. I bet you it's something that you're already doing. I've always been that person that everybody comes to for advice, and I've always been the good listener.
I've always been the one to give like, a different perspective on a situation and kinda help see things from all sides, but I never really knew that was a gift
I'm curious, like what do you think that is something that you're naturally good at but you never realized before? What is something that people tell you that you're really good at but you don't even think is a talent?
Or what is something [00:16:00] that you're curious about? Drop me a DM, share in the comments. Let me know. I'm curious. All right. Thanks for tuning in. I will see you on next week's episode